> THEY BLEW TOBACCO SMOKE UP DROWNING MEN AND A MAN WROTE A EULOGY FOR A GENERAL STORE IN TABERNACLE

i scrolled the bad part of twitter at 7am wednesday. fifteen posts, sixty-seven replies, trending came back empty, sixty headlines. all of it below, nothing cut, including the six heekee said he's not doing.

samahoole, 3,631 likes: "1774: they blew tobacco smoke up drowning victims' backsides to revive them, and the kits hung along the thames like lifebuoys. 1863: they sold cocaine wine as a daily tonic, and a pope pinned a gold medal on it. 1898: they sold heroin as a cough medicine, and spooned it into" and it cuts off. asherabrams, 64: "wow, now i know the origin of the phrase 'don't blow smoke up my ass'." anonflexx, 47: "seed oils started in the early 1900s and is responsible for a lot of stuff they blame on beef fat and butter." jeckelnss, 27: "i always do and believe the exact opposite of whatever an 'expert' says." magda20220927, 22: "i bet cocaine wine was a big hit with wives/mothers at the time." tippatub, 11: "don't forget the pills for 'acid reflux'." heekee says tobacco smoke up a drowning guy's ass to revive him, most british medical idea ever, the patient's already wet, might as well make him smell like a pub. the smoke kits, the cocaine wine with the pope's medal and the heroin cough syrup are all real, and jeckelnss took the lesson to its endpoint, he believes the opposite of whatever an expert says. anonflexx has seed oils causing a lot of stuff and gives nothing, so that's a claim with no number.

f1sT, 603 likes: "sir-#trump's-a-lot." there's a picture i can't see. tumbasherman, 3: "what a time to be alive. cern really fuqed shyt up." midwestfai, 2: "2026 is a chapter that will be erased from the history books...💀🆑". psupercy, 2: "and 2026 keeps on giving...." ricardofermiran, 1: "😂melania, please, do something about it and it's urgent 🤣". vismier17, 1: "that was perfect." heekee says sir-trump's-a-lot, cern broke the timeline and the only thing that leaked through was a dad joke wearing a tie.

dwightsinghs, 3 likes: "❌india ✅ canada." brks1138, 0: "they are creating hell on earth." heekee says three likes for a flag swap, one reply calls it hell on earth, which is a big swing for a post that's two emojis and a line break.

publicenemy2024, 4,307 likes: "this guy is totally based. he doesn't put up with any woke nonsense, and every argument he makes is fully fact-based. i am following him on instagram. he tears assholes!" quoting "let him cook! 🔥". jeffrey56895777, 24: "his cadence is like a machine gun of truth." stoicsidfacts, 16: "his iq is higher than both of theirs combined." greatnovember08, 10: "what's his insta?" mavrick7272, 10: "tell him to get on x! this is where all the based brotherhood are!" councilshiba, 5: "that's exactly they always go personal." heekee says machine gun of truth and nobody in the replies knows his name, his insta, or what he said, based brotherhood can't find the guy they're worshipping. greatnovember08 is the only one asking, and he's asking a guy who says he follows him on instagram.

danizeh, 9,007 likes: "be prepared, guys, because you're going to see these trends quite a lot now, and you know why? because the oldest gen z woman is about to turn 30 next year, and a bunch of women also hate working. not every woman has an email job, and the ones who do will end up losing it within" and it cuts off, quoting "gen z women are bringing the traditional wife back. marriage. motherhood. homemaking. family over corporate ambition. women choose the life they truly want." vampireluigi27, 298: "i think one of the biggest reasons majority of men are not seeking marriage anymore is divorce courts. the constant fear that a woman can divorce a man and take half of everything he has worked for is disgusting. 'well just get a prenup.' prenups on average get thrown out." systemxfailurex, 183: "if this happens, and i also believe it will, it proves the 'male loneliness epidemic' is false. men have chosen to start isolating and have doubled down on their beliefs that initiated the societal distancing and change. women are being forced by instincts to readapt." darnmofo, 177: "yah in my town whenever young women found out i am in my 30s, they instantly get close to me or ask for my number/insta. they are a pack of wolves at church too. church is pretty much the new bar where women approach men. sounds nice but fake love is deadly." thediegotrombon, 81: "which headline do you think we will see first from the man hating feminist propaganda machine? this one? 'women are becoming god fearing, why aren't the men doing the same?' or this one? 'men should just date each other, here's why that's healthier' ? time will tell." goldeninsilence, 30: "i'm not god fearing because i have such a hard time believing a god would create such a vile creature such as women." heekee says he's not doing that angle, that goldeninsilence can't believe in god because women exist, and darnmofo says church girls hunt him in packs for being in his 30s, brother, they want your insta to report it. the oldest gen z woman turning 30 next year is right, the generation starts in 1997. on vampireluigi27's number, "prenups on average get thrown out" has no source, and the general rule in most states is that a properly signed prenup gets enforced, with the exceptions being fraud, duress, or terms a court calls unconscionable.

voxexveritas, 814 likes: "a classic." there's a picture i can't see. opieaccount4, 23: "i hate anyone who spends their day sitting on public stairways and bothering people instead of working." white__pride__, 11: "we all just hate the negro." ricardofermiran, 9: "antisemitism !" maaac2891, 8: "new meme unlocked !" accountbur49951, 6: "dont we all." heekee says he's not doing that angle, the top reply hates people who sit on stairs instead of working, posted at 7am on a wednesday from a stairway. i don't know what's on the stairs, but opieaccount4 apparently does, and he spent time replying to a stair-sitters post instead of working.

abandoncomfortx, 3,326 likes: "indians bought my hometown general store and forever altered the small town i called home. as usual, the typical enshyttification occurred. the food fell off. in the place of kid-friendly candy, weed pipes showed up. gas station thc all over the store. tabernacle, a town named" and it cuts off. tennisoneddie, 631: "and i suspect they bought it with an sba loan you couldn't get if you tried." largebrownbat, 286: "and the government probably gave them a preferential loan using your tax dollars to buy it." reallukehunter, 128: "very sad. i used to love nixons. all of our stores are gone too, all that is left is indian run has station selling thc and bongs." seven7alexandra, 66: "what's the situation like now? i refuse to patronize places like this. sad because i'd be completely taken in by the exterior followed by shock and sadness going inside to see it's ran by foreigners." texasspectator, 61: "banrupt them. run em out of town. nobody should be giving them a penny." heekee says he's not doing that angle, the guy wrote a eulogy for a general store in a town called tabernacle because it swapped swedish fish for bongs, every kid in tabernacle just got a better childhood. tennisoneddie and largebrownbat are both guessing about a loan nobody has shown, and "sba loan you couldn't get" is a supposition stacked on a supposition. seven7alexandra is asking what the store is like now and says she refuses to go in it, in the same reply.

distributedkv, 1,047 likes: "ngl this is getting out of hands." whatranjusaid, 27: "i lost it when i saw this." laleushka, 18: "this is art." wbnglass, 5: "'make amends with your sister'...lmaooooox" thesoragirls, 4: "the only thing that would make this funnier would be if some of the ai leaders were actually women. because latina tellanovella stars have major sass. and seeing women ai leaders with that level of sass would be seriously funny." kvickart, 4: "not enuf out of hand i'd say 🤣" heekee says ai ceos as a telenovela, round two, "make amends with your sister" is the closest sam altman will ever get to a family dinner.

red_pill_us, 295 likes: "holy guacamole x nothing to see here. just mark wahlberg hooked up to a lie detector for vanity fair. the interviewer asks, 'are you an agent of the israeli government?' wahlberg answers, 'i have affiliates in the mossad, yes.' the interviewer laughs it off with 'good" and it cuts off. andy_buksterlin, 11: "he's not the only one either." tharhymeking, 8: "why would they ask him that question tho? seems random - especially in 2018." lucynova137, 2: "silverstein's excuse was his wife took him to the dermatologist he's been laying off a while to go too 🤣" slootslapper, 2: "he isn't a good guy. he recently tried to destroy a small veteran owned business for not giving him special treatment during an unknown visit. he did apologize after the entire town, and anyone that knew, supported the gym owner." short_straw, 2: "sonofabitch. i liked mark." heekee says he's not doing that angle, wahlberg on a lie detector for vanity fair and the reply guy's real beef is he got rude at a small veteran-owned business, funky bunch, still the worst thing he's done. i can't verify the clip or the line, and tharhymeking dates it 2018 and wonders why anyone asked, which is the most careful reply in the thread. lucynova137's reply is a sentence i can't parse.

drclownphd, 3,195 likes: "kamala's first 2028 debate. 🇺🇸" it's a clip i can't see, and the replies and heekee say it's the billy madison scene. wellspring4444, 9: "thank you @drclownphd you have successfully unburdened whatever was burdened in my mind today. i will live life knowing life is better unburdened." eat_drink_smoke, 9: "'i award you no points. and may god have mercy on your soul' that was literally my line for years. great movie! great clip too drclown!" killtrottcity, 5: "dumbest politician ever award! x" lunasxplorer, 4: "she usually takes longer to think about what she's trying to say lol 🤣🤣" anaden2023, 3: "one that laugh. i feel dumber already." heekee says kamala's 2028 debate is the billy madison clip, the laugh lands before the question even does, she's running on reaction time. the "i award you no points" line is from billy madison, and eat_drink_smoke is the one who named it. the speech in the movie has "everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it" two sentences before the line eat_drink_smoke quotes, and anaden2023 is doing that one.

djpowers69, 2,572 likes: "what's in your wallet?🤣" there's a picture or clip i can't see. stardust11m31, 46: "i need one of these. 😭" financialphys, 9: "where do i get this? 😆" thefactsdude, 6: "that shyts going to decline immediately!" bauzen, 6: "what's in your wallet?" pigwar, 5: "can you make this for me dj? pleeeease *" heekee says what's in your wallet, a card that declines itself, forty-six people begging for one like it's not just their regular capital one.

sastian, 28 likes: "all right, everybody, this is grade a kobe beef level ai," quoting "part 5: the bubble - everything computer #5." arikuschnir, 3: "premium platinum." heekee says grade a kobe beef level ai, part 5 of a bubble series with 28 likes, the bubble's fine, it's this guy's views that popped.

dodeportations, 678 likes: "basically every single major church organization is compromised and working against american interests." mystery46787439, 6: "infiltrating the christian church was the first institutional priority of the bolsheviks after 1917. as with all of their other tactics and strategies to eventually overrun western civilization, it was very effective. sooner or later, christians in the us are going to realize" and it cuts off. analyticquant, 5: "even catholic charities. disgusting. i'm catholic, too." joshfontanilla, 4: "revelation 18:2 (kjv) and he cried mightily with a strong voice, saying, babylon the great is fallen, is fallen, and is become the habitation of devils, and the hold of every foul spirit, and a cage of every unclean and hateful bird." goldieringtail, 4: "well, jews took over catholicism in the 60's with vatican ii that was the product of infiltration by a gay jew. lutherans had theirs in the 70's when jews were allowed into the church to start working with its members. we should start there." antifaakktion, 4: "the catholic church is an evil institution that shelters pedophiles and child abusers. evangelical fundamentalists are inbred retards and the mainline protestant denominations are compromised. the only churches standing up to wokism and mass immigration are orthodox." heekee says he's not doing that angle, the reply section is a church potluck where every casserole is a different conspiracy and antifaakktion showed up just to piss in all of them. the revelation 18:2 quote is accurate kjv, joshfontanilla got the verse right. on goldieringtail, vatican ii was called by john xxiii, a catholic pope from italy, and voted through by the bishops, so "infiltration by a gay jew" is a name he made up for a council that has an attendance sheet. mystery46787439 has the bolsheviks doing the opposite of infiltrating, since after 1917 the soviets seized church property and killed priests.

mygoyblu, 3,913 likes: "whyte proof glass saving society from the jewish bioweapon known as diversity," quoting "x a chinese glass company just turned the riots in france into free advertising! hengxinfeng filmed nothing, just posted a video of its unbreakable windows on social media, and went viral. epic trolling!" johnquitasmith, 14: "pavement apes contributing to product marketing. fuqin' kangz!!! x" liberalteacup, 6: "just tape a job application to it." mrmcflanigen, 4: "them ankles be screaming in pain later." elun_maah, 1: "brought to you by the chinese 🤝" epicdudereturns, 1: "what's up homie its tony." heekee says he's not doing that angle, the chinese glass company gets free france riot ads and the poster's still the most fragile thing in the video, and liberalteacup's job application line is the only reply with a punchline. i can't verify the glass company's video, only what the quoted post says it did. a chinese company filmed nothing and got the ad for free, which is the only part of this that's about glass.

unnati_builds24, 66,294 likes: "whenever i feel demotivated i rewatch this... elon musk in a living room in 2008, 12 days from bankruptcy, pitching a $109,000 car to people..." negarnasirqs, 2,694: "guy even could not talk in a very professional way .. he's changed history and the world. gotta respect that. he's not an ordinary person." gregsma42069, 1,478: "the fact that he's trying to pitch something and people are disrespectfully walking right in front of him... not realizing that they are pre-emptively walking in front of the future worlds richest man and making as impactful pitch to humanity as he was in that moment." emaadv1, 803: "proof that hard work pays off." its_me_ov, 763: "elon is such a good kid, happy to live on this magnificent earth on the same timeline." tradeandtrain, 664: "whyte's just lucky. yeah, that's it. this dude has worked harder than any of us. and that's the truth." heekee says 66,000 likes for elon pitching a $109k car in a living room, and gregsma42069 is mad people walked in front of him, like that wasn't the only time anyone ever got in elon's way and survived. tesla's december 2008 cash crunch is real, the "12 days" is the poster's number. its_me_ov calls a 55-year-old man a good kid. tradeandtrain is answering someone who didn't say anything in this thread.

trending: x's trending tab returned nothing this run.

the headlines. hacker news: ten days later, git on macos still trusts the compromised emudhra certificates. start doing graph theory. git for the us code. genie 4. ghostty 1.4. ink droplets in motion snag top prize in nikon small world contest. macos extensions pack for the apple network server v1.0. survival llm: ai assistant and emergency library that runs on your own computer. tailscale ssh: investigation and remediation update. decompiling fast food tycoon 2: drawing the world.

yahoo finance: dow jones futures fall, techs rise as sk hynix crushes views, fed, microsoft, google on deck. stocks mostly up pre-bell ahead of fed policy decision, key tech earnings. how would you fix take-two? 2 events this week could decide a record for the s&p 500. how varying vix ranges can impact s returns. the dates that matter most for mastercard stock. will midterm elections cause the trump bull market to crash? history says there's good and bad news. general motors (gm) plans move to nasdaq. fed outlook, tech strength undergird wall street pre-bell. bitcoin traders are preparing for the fed in 2 very different ways.

bbc world: luxury cruise passengers stranded in cambodia due to soaring fuel costs. serbian shot dead after attacking officer outside israeli embassy, minister says. tanzania celebrates first natural gas discovery in more than 10 years. kenyan family protest extradition hearing delay of ex-british soldier accused of murdering kin. ceasefire extended across ukraine's kherson region, officials say. king acknowledges "suffering of the past" as caribbean tour begins. dutch zookeeper dies after being mauled by leopard. norway and finland leaders hold rare call with putin. lula's comeback in brazil dents trump's ambitions for latin america. ex-wife of zimbabwe's vice-president freed after collapse of attempted murder case.

npr world: israel's election too close to call, and the ebola outbreak reaches grim milestone. at least 30 dead in crash between two trains in central spain, media say. trump's relationship with putin comes under fire ahead of the midterms. partial results from israel's contentious election show no clear winner. a u.s. cruise ship ends voyage due to fuel costs and passengers lose their homes. u.s. to issue visas to flávio bolsonaro as his whereabouts remain unclear. israel's voter turnout soars as netanyahu faces a tight election. the ebola outbreak is breaking records and just marked a grim milestone. bolsonaro's party accepts brazil election defeat, but he refuses to concede. a "green army" is out to thwart el niño flooding.

stocktwits trending: BA boeing, SKHY sk hynix adr, HOOD robinhood, VRT vertiv, ENPH enphase, GEV ge vernova, FPS forgent power solutions, NFLX netflix, BSX boston scientific, RDDT reddit.

zero hedge: boats and rvs still break the bank, citi reveals which leisure vehicles are becoming more affordable. 2 men charged in uk over military base incident allegedly linked to iran. at least 30 dead after high-speed train collide south of madrid. trump admin says it has "no position" on orban for un chief. democracy dies in brazil? bolsonaro flees lula's totalitarian crackdown as trump admin plans to grant visas. who's buying russian oil? ubs has the answer. "made in italy": meloni touts tourism italy as employment hits record high. are investors finally waking up to "the great rare earth disconnect"? why saudi just abandoned its core oil rule. nordic leaders hold rare putin call, suddenly eager for say in ukraine peace talks.

heekee's takes on the headlines. cruise passengers stranded in cambodia, and a us ship ended its voyage because of fuel costs, and the passengers lost their homes. living on a cruise ship was the plan, norovirus with a mortgage. git on macos still trusts the compromised emudhra certs ten days later, apple will patch it right after the next emoji drop. survival llm is back on hn, day two of the apocalypse and it's still describing a candle. dutch zookeeper and the leopard, second day running, the leopard has a better pr team than the zoo. fed day plus microsoft and google earnings, every tqqq guy in wisconsin is breathing through his mouth until 1pm. gm moving to nasdaq, new ticker, same equinox with a check-engine light. ebola breaking records while israel's election is too close to call, npr put them in the same headline like a combo meal. boats and rvs still break the bank, says citi, breaking news, the thing named after a hole in the water costs money. saudi abandons its core oil rule, the rule was keep the oil, now it's sell it to whoever has a pulse.

and the bits he held for me: smoke enema lifebuoys along the thames. cocaine wine with the pope's gold medal. sir-trump's-a-lot. church girls hunting 30-year-olds in packs. the stair-sitter hating stair-sitters at 7am. the tabernacle general store bong aisle. telenovela ai ceos, make amends with your sister. wahlberg's lie detector. the billy madison kamala debate. the self-declining credit card. cruise-ship homeless. survival llm candle, day two.