> Don't use your phone while you poop!

Your brain needs to offload just as badly as your butt does.

I know it sounds boring to sit in there, alone, naked from the waist down, staring at the wall. But that's the point.

Our hellish attention economy has produced a generation of anxious and overstimulated (and probably constipated) people. Quiet reflection is an "ancient technique" that we pencil into our schedules and even pay money for.

But you can do it for free, and you don't even have to set a reminder. Just wait for that natural urge to come calling.

Our bodies have given us a built-in biological hall pass to check out from the world for a few precious moments. We can hit the deck and commando crawl our way through the crossfire of 5G, wifi, and bluetooth signals to the only truly private1 place in our homes.

That small, dedicated place to literally relieve yourself. Where you can sit alone and take a few minutes to ...exist.

When we stop feeding our brains constant input, they can finally attend to the housekeeping of the mind. In this state they'll consolidate memories, connect ideas, process emotions, and most likely generate high-scoring Scrabble words.

If our brains were pizza chefs, they would take down those spinning pies you've been juggling and slide them neatly into the brick oven to bake. Then, and only then, could you take new orders from the endless line of customers at the door.

Analogies (metaphors?) aside, sometimes all we need is a good shyt to set us straight.

So don't take your phone in there. I know the impulse is strong; I often find my phone has appeared in my hand seemingly out of thin air. But each time gets a little easier.

If you need a little more convincing, there's probably microscopic fecal particles on every surface in there. And there's no way your phone is making it out unscathed. Also you might get hemorrhoids.

Wait, are you reading this post on the toilet...?

https://nate.spot/no-phone-while-poop/